Monday, August 01, 2011


My daughter has turned into a reading machine. It is awesome, considering she hasn't started Kindergarten yet. Everywhere we go, everything we do, she reads, reads and reads. Highway signs. Billboards. Storefront displays. Receipts from restaurants.

She is doing such a great job with it and she impresses me every day. In addition, some of her reading adventures have been quite entertaining, not to mention embarrassing.

We were at Starbucks on Friday morning and she was reading everything in sight.

"Real Food, Simply Delicky-ous" - written on the recyclable napkins.

"White Chocolate Motcha" - written on the drink menu.

"Tall, Grained, Vent-Eye" - reading the various drink sizes of Tall, Grande and Venti.

She's doing a fabulous job; she gets 95% of the words right, AND comprehends what she is reading. But listening to her pronounce words the way they are literally spelled is my favorite.

We detoured to Dunkin Donuts on Sunday to grab a bagel, and they are currently doing an ad campaign to coincide with the "Captain America" movie. There was a life sized ad in the store for a coolata that read "The coolest way to be a hero."

Except when Amanda read it aloud for the entire store to hear, it was "The coolest way to be a whore."

Slightly embarrassing, mostly cute. Wasn't nearly as bad as when we were picking out birthday cards for my sisters. She was selecting cards and reading them aloud (and once again the entire store could hear her) and she mispronounced the word "counts." Yup. I felt a bit like Larry David in the "Beloved Aunt" episode of "Curb."

My favorite, though, was when we were leaving Starbucks on Friday morning.

"Free Whiffy!" she squeals with delight.

Whiffy? Whiffy??? I couldn't for the life of me figure out what she was reading. And then, upon exiting, I saw the sign next to the door.

"Free Wi-Fi."

Free Whiffy.